"He would leave for 9–12 weeks at a time and come back for one to two weeks. I was exhausted from having a child who needed weekly doctor visits and treatments (cancer). "As I lay in a hospital bed, waiting for my husband to get there on baby number three, I realized I had done all three pregnancies alone. He becomes very insulting and verbally abusive, probably because that's what he grew up with. He doesn't back me up when I try to discipline, and when he does 'try' to discipline, he does it when he's angry. He is inconsistent with enforcing hygiene and homework. He also won't enforce rules, limits, or bedtimes. You can't control someone who sees your game and won't participate. She gave up trying to control me a long time ago because I didn't engage with her. He tries to use her shaming tactics on me, but they don't work on me. I wish I had known his parents still held that much power over him, specifically his mother. "He also wasn't used to being with someone who wasn't okay with that kind of passive behavior. He was afraid to say no to his parents because he was used to doing whatever they wanted him to do." I felt like I was an awful person and that I made him feel that way, but I was wrong. "The night I was going to be induced to deliver my first child, I found my husband curled up in the bottom of the shower, bawling his eyes out because I told him to tell his parents not to bother coming to the hospital AT MIDNIGHT. It was the best decision I ever made to leave someone who had so little regard for two innocent, sweet little boys."Ĩ. I went back, I tried hard, he continued his affair, and I finally took the kids and started over. I had just given birth to our second child, so I wanted to save my marriage. All my furniture and belongings were in storage at the new location. He had started an affair, probably before we moved, and was planning to be with the new woman. I received a phone call from my husband telling me I should probably not return and just continue to live with my parents. She flew to visit him from the state we had just left. While the kids and I were gone, a woman he had worked with at his previous job came to visit him. "We had a three-year-old and a three-month-old, and it was not easy to be stuck in a hotel room, so I took the kids to visit my parents, and that way, my husband could focus on his new job. Fast forward a month, and we're living in a new state, in a hotel, while our house is being completed." I stupidly thought he had just hugged a lot of nice-smelling people at his party. When I took his clothes out of the hamper the following day, they reeked of perfume. My husband at the time attended a going-away party with his work friends, which I could not attend because I had just had a child. "We had just had our second child and were preparing to move to a different state.
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